The Twisted Affair of Love and Pain Called Life

My trip home to California plunged me, once again, into the darkest recesses of my toxic mind. Feelings from my past—hurt and sadness, anger and frustration—resurfaced after long absence. I lost my inspiration and caved under the weight of painful family turmoil, sinking right back into the bleak despair I struggled with for so many years…

Needless to say, I am not proud of my failure to inspire myself or my family with the love and hope that flowed so abundantly during my stay in India.

Clearly my decent into darkness was God’s way of showing me that until I untangle the mess of anger and resentment hidden inside the lockbox of my past, I can never achieve lasting peace or satisfaction in any of my pursuits. In other words, it’s a sequential thing.

On The Lighter Side

During my visit home, I rediscovered the news junkie within and I’ve just one thing to say; Americans and the world have hope, ‘cause that Obama guy is kickin’ arse and taking names! Not a fan of Billary, I was relieved to see her lose the primary election on the eve of my departure…now we just gotta crush McSame in the general. And that my friends, is enough of that.

What's Next?

Ill-suited for a life in Southern California (no car, no health insurance, no inclination to shower daily…) but aware of a need for a home base in The West, I decided to establish myself in beautiful downtown Montreal.

For those of you with even less geographical skill than me, Montreal is situated in the east of Canada, in the province of Quebec. It’s my fourth visit (see entries from October 2005) and I still love this place. Not only is it incredibly beautiful but I have a growing network of amazing friends who have made every effort to welcome me and get me settled in. I’ve got a (free) place to stay for a couple of weeks, my very own beater bicycle, free access to the YMCA’s saltwater pool and – possibly – a job painting houses! It’s not the teaching gig I was hoping for, but manual labor is one of those things I simply must try at least once…

Stay tuned for much more!

Hugs and kisses,
A la prochaine,

LMA