The Age of Unlimited Optimism


Today I am testing out a new diet; it’s called the “All Cookies, All The Time, Weight Loss Stratagem.” So far I am having minimal success, but I will be sure to update everyone on my progress. I think by early next week I should start seeing some results.

When all else is lost, at least I’m not puffing on cancer sticks (no offense to my Swiss Contingent, of course). I figure I’m saving at least $10 duckets a week, which comes to $520 big ones by D-Day (as in Dee-parture Day). My ambitious savings goal means that every ducket counts!

In other news, I am slowly getting my living quarters in order. The big benefit of living in a tiny (by American standards) space is the built-in incentive to downsize. Not only do I not want one single extra thing, but I find myself wondering if I can live without some things (“But how often are we really using the couch?”)

Last night I tried to enlist my San Diego Contingent as a potential consumer of my blahg. The official response was “I don’t get it. Please explain.” That’s why I’ve decided to include more exclamation points and interactive topics, starting with Fun Science Facts!

Fun Science Facts!

For those of you who have been waiting with baited breath, Avogadro’s Number is the calculated value of the number of atoms, molecules, etc. in a gram mole of any chemical substance, but that’s not all. The real shocker is that the number of molecules in a mole is 6.022 * 10 to the 23rd power. That is, 602,200,000,000,000,000,000,000 or about the same number of cookies I consumed last month. Another offender in the Useless Information Taking Up Space In My Head category is the quadratic equation;

-b +/- sq root (b squared-4(a)(c))/2a

Can anyone tell me what the quadratic equation is for??

Join us next time for the answer and a new philosophical treatise on Lagrange Multipliers and the Essence of Optimization.



Present Functionality (on a scale of 1-10): 4

Most Annoying Person Today: Huge guy next to me on the bus obsessively re-arranging his task icons in Outlook on his laptop computer with his huge elbows violating the arms length rule.

Where I Most Want To Be Right Now: Havelock Island